Bush's Apology Poem.......

“I lost my friends today; I’d had them for so long. I lost my companions this day; they used to tag along. I lied to them and conjured them, and beat them at all the games. I took their buildings, here and there, and their brothers face. I have no blame for any actions that they let me indulge. They had their chance, the seventy percent, to choose the path they bought. But the thirty remaining, the blessed three-zero, are content on my words. And the holy quest of democracy can continue around the world. He`, he`. Yah. Now lets take a questions from the gentleman in the front row, with the brown cow-boy hat and Texas belt buckle….be brutal sir…I can take it…”

Scientology saved my life.......

Scientology saved my life. No, seriously; stop laughing. How else could I, a middle class man discover that I am holy through my talents. No seriously; why are you laughing? I, along with my fellow Studiers of Truth, such as that guy from that movie about the TV show about spies…and that real old gay actor who danced with paint cans and traded his face with some other douche…..and that South Park black guy…what was his name…Chef black guy or something, are all holy because of our artistic ability that enables us to reach out to our fellow man. Screw Christianities love. We’ve got it. Screw Buddha’s enlightenment; we are there. If you’ve got time to sit through mind bogglingly technological readings through a soul-interpreting machine, you can increase your triangular points scale, and you need enough money. Did I mention that? It’s as simple as the test in your favorite magazine. If you are dead, you score a “0.” If you are as great as Muhammad or Siddhartha, then you get a “40.” In between is a bunch of states of crap-being that you might as well ignore. Tip: Go for the 40.